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That's crook as in ill, unwell, feeble, queasy, frail, delicate, poorly, ailing, infirm, indisposed, under the weather, sick as a dog, in a bad way, rooted.
I've been all of these things this past week, first with the flu, then with a stomach wog.
And speaking of 'sick as a dog', as I was rolling on the floor in agony with what was probably wind but felt like imminent death, I kept bumping into our faithful hound, who'd decided she'd help make me better by lying as close to me as possible and sighing a lot.
As I looked into her big, brown eyes, I thought of all the little golden retriever ways I'd come to know over the years and said, "If I die and no one finds me before 5 o'clock, you won't eat me will you?"
On the upside, I'm feeling a bit better today and at least got to be sick in cosmopolitan surroundings.
We were up in Perth for a few days, not that I got to see anyone or do anything or go anywhere because I was too ill.
But the car trip was a blast. There's nothing like 400kms-worth of sitting still to make you realise that the human body is an amazing thing.
I mean, I can't think of anything else that would be capable of producing enough snot in four and a half hours to fill the MCG.
I was so busy blowing my nose, I almost missed one of the highlights of the trip.
It's just past the half-way mark and is known (in our family anyway) as The Place of the Three Signs.
In the space of just a few minutes you see these signs on the side of Albany Highway:
1. Welcome to Kojonup, First Shire With 1,000,000 Sheep
2. Moodiarrup
3. Crapella Rd
I hang out for these signs because:
1. My husband always says, "So many sheep, so little time" (I'm easily amused).
2. I love the name Moodiarrup. I often wonder if the locals shorten it to Moody, as Ravensthorpe is shortened to Ravie and Cuballing to Cubby. The picture at the top of this post is of the Moodiarrup Hall, which you can read about here.
3. Our dog's name is Ella.
And that's it really. One thing I love about writing this blog, as opposed to writing a newspaper column, is that I can just stop whenever I want without having to think of anything clever to finish off with.
So this is what I'm finishing off with today: The MCG is about to overflow. I'm going back to bed.
16 comments:
Wow Perth is dat place day I'm at :P Anyhoo, no dogs aren't the ones who eat their owners. Cats maybe... tigers hell yeah. Don't own a tiger. Or a panther. Do you think you can handle not owning a pet that will eat you? (I know, disapointing isn't it? I personally wanted a lion... and a Panda. But encouraging the two to fight over who gets to eat my little brother was considered cruel by my mother, along with not practical, so I never got my Lion-Panda showdown!)
I remember once being sick... the tissue box lasted an entire week... by magic. I don't know how that happened because it always seemed to be less than half full... until it ran out and then it was empty. (no really it was constantly being used... creepy. Perhaps it has something to do with my house being called The Overlook? :P) So you have the magical TARDIS nose (bigger on the inside) and I had the magical TARDIS tissue box... probably would've come in handy I suppose. How many tissues boxes did you go through?
Well congrats for them having lots of sheep. I... don't want to know.
Hehehe Moodiarrup. Do the monthly visit jokes write themselves or do I just have to be the immature one in the entire audience to make that connection?.... *cough*
Ooohh so THAT'S why Crapella Rd is amusing. I was seriously wondering why that was important... is it a nice sign? Does it flash? Is it very rusty? (Rusty red-brown Crapella Rd... hmm)
Well get well soon. I command it!
The tummy wog thing, well we had it here, not nice!
Roadtrips, my favourite! I do one regularly to Jurien Bay but the only thing i ever see is kangaroos (one tried to hitch a ride), road trains (lots of) and the holiday makers.
Get better soon.
Mr Dalgyte: Tardis nose? Brilliant. I know several people who hate little kids, maybe I should send one over to eat your little brother.
Birgitta: I've no idea why people horde newspapers but I do know it's really common. History buffs maybe? Keeping an eye on Woolies specials over the decades? Loonies?
Thank you both for your best wishes.
Well I hate little kids too. Even if the little kids are only two years younger than me.... he's getting too large he needs to be eliminated. Quick! Send your minions to destroy him before he grows up! (That way I might just get his PsP and Nintendo DS. Mwahaha)
come to think of the faithful hound thing where they come up close and you wonder if they will eat you or hopefully not. My faithful sneaks into my bedroom and curls up next to my bed and will not move for any bribe usually when i am unwell or if something has upset me. i tell you dogs have an incredible sense they know when we are pregnant, sad, they just seem to have this 'let me come up and snuggle next to you' thing.
At this moment I am packing my car for another road trip (mum lives in Jurien Bay) and the moment I even think that i have to go, my dog knows and she follows me like a bad smell (well not really a smell but you know what i mean). If I make the mistake of leaving the car door open, guess who is inside before you can say 'you are not coming'?
anyway better go, have to be on the road at 5am.
Had a thought, i will look and see if there are any interesting signs or whatever on my travels...
Michele, I live up Lancelin way, and my parents live in Denmark, so I do the trip regularly. I have noticed Kojonup's sheep bragging, and the others you mentioned. Have you seen the funny face on the tree, left side heading south. (Not sure how far south). It's made out of a witches hat (road works) and other stuff. It's opposite a large field of canola - at least it was when the canola was yellow and noticeable! Probably still is, even if you can't see the canola. I'm on my way down for Mother's Day, so I'll find out exactly where it is. I know you'll be waiting with baited breath for the info.
Glad you're feeling better.
Suzanne
found Waddi road and Bibby road..not very interesting. On bibby road there is Emu Downs Windfarm, Bibby Springs and Bibby Downs.
Suzanne, I've seen the face on the tree. We've made the trip so many times I think I know every bit of that highway off by heart.
Birgitta, stick those names togeher and you've got Jurien Bay's first rapper - Bibbywaddi. It may not be P. Diddy but it's a start.
Watch out for magpies. I hand feed a family of them (they get very close sometimes...). A work colleague told me of her friend's grandmother who used to feed magpies, then she collapsed and... well, she won't tell me the rest, but I can imagine.
I've heard they like to burrow in through your belly button. This could be the start of a good urban myth...
Cuballing locals spell it Cuby, and Wickepin shortens its name to Wicky. Narrogin often just gets called The Gin.
There used to be a sign on Brand Hwy, right hand side, declaring "Tootbardi"! Yes, you guessed it, each road trip resulted in hubby tooting the car horn. Have noticed on our last couple of trips that it is gone........and relish the sound of silence! About to take off up the Highway once more - will take more notice of the signs!
Anon: my husband told me I'd misspelled Cuby, also that Ravie is Ravy. I hate it when he's right. It's happening far too often lately :)
Warrs: keep your eyes peeled. If I can find enough silly ones I'll start up Sign of the Week.
what about nammegarra road and wongonderrah road?
Thanks Birgitta. How's sunny Jurien?
It was great Michele. I would dearly love to have a house there, but somehow i haven't found a money tree or won lotto.
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